Monday, November 23, 2009

emails from lawyers married to each other

I'll preface this post with a little back-story... While I read a lot of books about cannibals / foodies / sassy, sailor-mouthed, full-figured ladies, Evs reads a lot of news.  Probably at least once a day I get an email with a link to some article of interest.  Which is much appreciated by my Intellectual Growth Sector, seeing as most of my news is received via Good Morning America (I puffy heart you Diane! Don't leave!) and Go Fug Yourself.

This afternoon, up popped two articles regarding new wholly sustainable architecture in the works downtown, as well as a future project to create whitewater for kayakers on the Trinity River (although not necessary to appreciate the titillating repartee that follows, you can read them here and here if you really want to).

Aaaaaand Scene:



From: Kate
Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:14 PM
To: Evan
Subject: RE: Interesante!
Oooo we could take up kayaking!  Like [my parentals]!  Or live in a sustainable building!  Yay!

From:
 Evan

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:15 PM
To: Kate
Subject: RE: Interesante!


whatcha thank about that? big d becoming more like big A!  we should just stay heres for the rest of our lives and watch it develop! yay!

From:
 Kate

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:17 PM
To: Evan
Subject: RE: Interesante!
Time will tell. 
And I wouldn’t say that a multi-million dollar project to create fake waves is very “Austin-esque.” 

From:
  Evan

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:17 PM
To: Kate
Subject: RE: Interesante!


I would!  you need to have some type of imagination.  

From:
 Kate

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:21 PM
To: Evan
Subject: RE: Interesante!
Oh I’ve got imagination out of my wazoo!  I didn’t say it’s not cool – I like the idea very much!  A very interesting innovation! 

From:
 Evan

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:22 PM
To: Kate
Subject: RE: Interesante!


im hereby give you a yellow card for excessive use of the exclamation point.  one more infraction and you will be issued a red card and you will be kicked out of my email system.  LUM

From:
 Kate

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:23 PM
To: Evan
Subject: RE: Interesante!
Wow.  You suck.  That’s really mean.
Now I’m sad.
At least I use proper capitalization. 

From: 
Evan

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:25 PM
To: Kate
Subject: RE: Interesante!


what?  that is not reallly mean - I just was giving you a yellow card - I didnt give you a red card - I could have just given you the red card and skipped the yellow card, but since I love you I went ahead and gave you the benefit of the doubt and only gave you a warning.  That is love honey.  That is love.  

From:
 Kate

Sent: Monday, November 23, 2009 2:33 PM
To: Evan
Subject: RE: Interesante!
You should never give your wife a red card.  Maybe – MAYBE – she can go in the Penalty Box.   And only for things like “Withholding the Goodies Until Husband Agrees to See New Moon” or “Rigging The DVR So It Plays All Glee, All The Time.”


But straight-up eviction?  I don’t think so, Buster.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No snappy reply to that.  I think we all know who abused this metaphor all the way to V-I-C-T-O-R-Y!

11 comments:

  1. "Time will tell". That has got to be the best quip ever!! It fits almost any situation.

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  2. This is why Mr. A and I no longer really email during the day. We take stuff that is silly like this? And turn it to WWIII.

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  3. Love it! Oh, that I were brave enough to divulge our daytime emails...

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  4. Hah! Hubs said he should have never married a lawyer. I don't know if it would be better or worse if he was one, too.

    (He was joking about wishing he never married me- his life is far superior with me in it :))

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  5. I love it. All Glee All The Time -- that would be a dream come true!

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  6. Haha, that's hilarious! My conversations with my bf are about the same. Two corp business consultants going head to head!

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  7. I Love Love Love this. It cracked me up, thank you for sharing :-)

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  8. Oh Kate you just had me in hysterics in my morbidly quiet office!!! Thanks for cheering my gloomy day right up :)

    xx

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  9. I hope he never sees my blog! I have a whole post apologizing for my over punctuation (esp !!! and ...)
    !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Hahaha :)
    Wish I could pop a bottle of Ballatore with you and watch Felicity :)

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happy little comments!