Tuesday, May 29, 2012

watching and reading

Do y'all do the thing where you keep something you've already watched on your DVR just because it makes you happy and you figure, one day, somewhere down the line, you might really want to watch it again? 

POR EJEMPLO... Pam & Jim's wedding.  I could always count on the ending sequence {you know the one... the "we're secretly getting hitched at Niagra Falls on our own terms but we'll also suffer through a Chris Brown Down the Aisle Dance Off because we're really swell people" montage} for a good ugly cry and chuckle.

Realizing we'd lost that episode when we moved was a dark moment in my television history. 

ANYHOO... Methinks the most recent SNL finale will remain a perma-fixture on the ol' TV, if only for the very first and very last five minutes.  

Television does not get any better than a huge cobb-salad-like conglomeration of funny folk cheesin' it up with one another.  

ALSO: John Hamm.  Always and Forever.

RELATEDLY: We've been signing Ruby Tuesday 'round these parts for the past 8 days.

SPEAKING OF HYSTERICAL TV:  Are we all watching Veep?  

We should all be watching Veep.  

This little comedic Engine Who Can popped into our rotation solely because it is slotted immediately prior to Girls {which I also adore in a big way, by-the-by}.  Evan worked on the Hill {or is it "The Hill"... capital T?  Or should I say "Capitol T"?  PUNS!  Scratch this entire parenthetical... too much going on here} so I thought it might be up his alley... a little His Show to be followed by a Her Show, if you will.  

Well, smack me sideways into next Tuesday, I'm completely smitten!  The dialog is sharp and quick and dry and witty and inappropriate and just pee-your-pants funny.  It's everything a 30 minute "sitcom" {although that label seems ill-fitting} should be. 

MORAL: Grab yourself a fuckload of bread and get caught up on all the Veep-y Goodness. 

APROPOS TO NOTHING:  So.  Ug.  I'm doing the Fifty Shades of Gray Thing.  Much like when I said I'd never be seen in public with a top knot or buy something called a "jegging," my resolve faltered and my need to be in the loop with the rest of the free world kicked my better judgment's ass.

Is the writing horrific?  Sure. 

Do I want to sucker punch Anastasia Steele and her inner dialog in the face(s)?  Constantly. {see Point 2}

Are the authors of bodice-rippers everywhere shaking their fists at the heavens and cursing their inability to be at the exact right place at the exact right time?  Por supuesto. 

But you know what?  It's a fun read.  

Mindless and quick.  A wine cooler of a novel.  

Reminds me of when my mom would make me study for high school finals at the public library instead of Barnes & Noble, because everyone and their dog studied at Barnes & Noble and instead of being productive, we all just got hopped up on caramel frappuccinos and discussed whose older brother could buy us Zimas that weekend.  So off I'd dutifully trot to Westbank Library... which happened to stock a decent amount of romance novels... which I'd skim for the sex parts when I got bored with geometry... which, let's face it, was rather often {sorry, Mom}. 

Also, in my head, Christian Grey is {half Patrick Bateman / half Batman} Christian Bale, which is really not a terrible way to spend 1700 some odd pages of drivel.

So, ya know, good {enough-ish} times.  

I will say this as my Big! Point! of Contention!... 

Is it really all that hard to just call it a vagina?  If I have to read about "my sex" or the "apex of my thighs" one more damn time, I swear...  


Vagina, vagina, vagina. 

There.  Now I only have to say it 839 more times to set the universe right.  


  1. I said I wasn't going to read it too but then I gave in. Agree, agree, agree on all of your points!

  2. HAHAHHAA I agree on all of your points as well, especially using the word VAGINA!

  3. I agree with your last point especially! You're about the third person to tell me to start watching Veep, so I'll get on that today!

  4. Amen! Why does she have to say "there" in italics?!?! We are grown people, we don't have to speak in code! It's smut and I like smut so I'll keep reading them!

  5. Thank you!! I also said I was not gonna read those books, but peer pressure man, she's a bitch, and working in a library everyday and having people coming in raving about it, I caved. I was able to look past the horrible writing style after a few hundred pages, but just call it a vagina, please!

  6. Bless. No one told me what I was getting into, I was just like, "Give me the damn book, FINE." HOLY HOLY. I was just waiting for him to be a werewolf or something. BUT NO. He's not a werewolf. And then I got to wondering why all my SAHM Mormon friends recommended this to me, but that's a WHOLE nuther discussion.

  7. I kept thinking the same thing about "my sex". Who says that? I'll tell you...no one! Her inner goddess got on my nerves as well.

  8. VEEP!!!! Yes, yes, and yes.

    Getting raped with a croissant? Holy hell YES.

  9. Office wedding is the best tv wedding of ALL TIME!

    Also, I will miss Kristen Wiig So much next year. Loved their farewell to her.

  10. I haven't done the whole 50 Shades of Grey thing, but I'm pretty good at doing dramatic readings of crotch novels while relaxing on the beach. It's quite entertaining seeing my grandmother's reaction.

  11. I'm a big fan of her lack of knowledge of any adjective beyond . . . hot. Ellipses included.

  12. Long time reader, first time commenter. I adore your blog. I feel the same way about the Jim and am wedding. It used to make me so happy to watch the ending part over and over again. It really is the little things.

    50 Shades of Grey. Oh man. i had to read them all and the writing gets worse with each passing book. I also realized I could have written the books but alas I didn't. I have the same regret over this as I do for not thinking of Suri's Burn Book.

    Keep up the good blogging. My sex and I think you. Having just typed that it wasn't supposed to be as creepy as it sounds but I am just going to leave it.

  13. LOVE Veep! It is definitely a show N and I can agree on. I cannot get enough of it. It is laugh out loud – really loud – funny!

    This Fifty Shades phenomenon is ridiculous. I totally got sucked in last month. The writing is miserable, but it is still fun for what it was!

  14. Oh Fifty Shades, what a load of filth that I couldn't put down ;) My hugest pet peeve was the constant discussion of what acrobatics her "inner goddess" was up to - vomit. I assume you've seen the SNL spoof commercial for it! Hilariousness.

  15. Don't you have Netflix? All of the seasons of The Office are on their watch instantly (online, on your laptop) option, so I watch the wedding episode every once in a while. Git you some Netflix and you can watch it as much as you want!

  16. VEEP! Your post got me started watching and holy hell I just realized after watching all the episodes of this season so far - yes my husband and I did that in about 3 days - that her "Amy" is "My Girl"'s Anna Chlumsky. Love it.

  17. VEEP and Girls are my favorite TV escapes currently. I downloaded 50 shades of grey to my kindle but haven't started reading yet, I love me some occasional soft core lit... but I have mixed emotions of dread and delight to begin reading this one.


happy little comments!